I am starting to see so many consistencies in my youngsters and I am just starting to think, what is and what should be the primary purpose of this service I am offering. Is it sport related mental skills they lack or simply mental skills for coping, perceiving, processing and dealing with the emotions and pressures of performance? I don’t know how I feel on this one. I know, it seems a crazy suggestion being as my career, my passion and my profession are built around the notion that youth need sport psychology training. However, I would be doing my own practice an injustice if I did not learn from my experiences and continually question how I can really best help my clients…adults and youth.
The more and more I work with the young competitors the more I explore ways to reach them on their level of mental capacity. I don’t like to “talk down” to anyone, yet when you are dealing with 11 and 12-year-old minds you do have to modify your methods…just as I would not prescribe the same weight training program for an adult and a child. Developmentally they are just different. I use more visual cues, more anecdotal examples…more “pictures” and fewer words. However, I am still not sure they are really struggling with sport anxiety, sport perfectionism, on the field concentration…I would argue in a majority of cases they are struggling with anxiety, perfectionism and/or concentration across all domains (social, academic, interpersonal and, of course, athletic…which is why they end up in my office). What I end up discovering 9 times out of 10 is that the behaviors they display are not isolated. Nervousness before games mimics nervousness before tests, mimics nervousness in unfamiliar social situations. When I find this is the case I wonder how much pressure a young, developing mind can withstand. I think back to my own experiences…I was in a highly academic school, I was continually struggling to “fit in” as all kids do in their own way, I was a highly competitive athlete, I was a member of my church youth group, I was a girl scout, and for many years I played the piano. When did I do anything that did not demand concentration, a competitive attitude, and an ability to perform in front of an audience. If I had not been able to cope with these elements of my activities and everyday experiences, I would certainly have had difficulty experiencing any sense of success and confidence, as I was given no opportunities in which failure, mistakes or an “off day” did not result in a significant negative outcome. I either failed a test, lost a game, was left out off the “guest list” or embarrassed myself on stage. Whew, I don’t even think I could handle that now, imagine doing that as a teenager. We think we are overworked when we have to leave the office a little past 5 o’clock, or go in a little early to get a headstart. Yet we ask our young athletes to juggle an 8 hour school day, practice (sometimes more than one), homework and any semblance of a social life (and not just with their teammates, but other circles of friends as well). Sounds familiar. We hear all the time about a “work-life” balance. Shouldnt our kids get the same opportunity? I urge you as parents to look at your child’s daily schedule. I am in no way saying that staying busy and active is a bad thing, it is one the most important and exciting part of being young and energetic. However, are all their activities high performance? Do they do some things that do not require scores, acceptance, high marks?
